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It’s Never too Late to Save a Relationship. By Odesina Ayobami

Would you believe me if I told you your relationship can be saved, even if you and your partner have hit rock bottom? Many people throw in the towel on their marriage when things look bad, but the truth is that your relationship can be salvaged and strengthened. Relationships are 100% repairable as long as both partners put in the effort. Even if your marriage has seen total devastation, it is possible to heal and reconnect with your partner to create an even stronger marriage union than before. Marriage is designed for durability and longevity. Although divorce is common, it is painful and damaging. Saving your relationship is far less traumatic than severing it. No matter how bad things have gotten, it is never too late to save your marriage. When couples make the choice to save a relationship, they offer themselves the chance to fall deeper in love than ever before. If children are involved, the rewards of staying together speak for themselves.

 First things First:
You and your partner may have reached a crossroads in your relationship where you must decide whether to salvage or dissolve it. If you are at that point, it is well worth the effort to consider every possibility to try to save the marriage. It may look dismal and seem impossible from where you are standing, but it is absolutely possible to save your relationship. The very first step to restoration is to be completely honest with yourself and your partner. Acknowledge what has gone wrong and that you want to try to fix it. You also must believe that restoration is possible. If you go into the process of repairing your relationship without believing it can happen, you rob yourself of the opportunity to heal. Do not make any rash decisions in this phase. If you and your partner are not on the same page, there is no harm in standing at the crossroads for a while. Hasty decisions to split to relieve immediate pain will only cause the pain to last. Enduring it for a moment and taking time to treat it properly and to heal will alleviate it.

 Focus on the Positives:

 Do you remember why you fell in love with your partner? Do you know what you love about your partner now? These are things that should captivate your focus as you begin the process of saving your relationship. The reasons to split will become overshadowed by the things that keep you two together. Each day, resolve to meditate on five things you love about your partner. Express gratitude for those things. This time of shift in focus will help you prioritize the needs of the relationship back to a “we” mentality instead of a “me” mentality. Couples who find themselves on the brink of divorce have often distanced themselves from the reasons they love their partner. Refocusing on these reasons will begin the restoration process. In addition to focusing on the things you love about your mate, find ways each day to express your love. Wash their car or complete a chore that is normally on their list. Give a genuine compliment. Offer to lighten their load or listen about their day. Acts of kindness go a long way to heal a strained relationship.

 Work through the Problems:

  No matter how bad things have gotten in your relationship, there is always a way to work through it. Even infidelity can be resolved through a lot of focused healing, counseling and time investment into the marriage. Couples who work through infidelity often report that their marriage is stronger than it ever was before. Deep pain has the potential to bring about deep healing. You and your partner have the opportunity to recover from what is typically the death of a marriage by resurrecting it into something even greater than before. Financial trouble can also lead to major marriage problems. The truth is, financial problems are far worse when a couple splits than if they stay together and work them out. They are also indicative of deeper issues, such as trust and control. Couples who seek help for these issues, and conquer them are a lot happier than people who divorce because of them. These are problems that will recycle in future relationships if they are not resolved.

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